Phase 3 Week 4 Day 2 Into Another Week

Dateline Wuxi, China Monday March 25, 2013

612 on the elliptical in 31 minutes again this morning.  Our machine is wearing out.  It’s no longer smooth, but turns in jerks that are really distracting.

I’ve been thinking on the subjectivity of time.  The first five minutes seem to go by very quickly.  Then it takes forever to get to the half way point, fifteen minutes, which figures because that’s twice as long.  Then forever again to get down to the five minute mark.  But the last five minutes go really quickly.  I’m wondering if this is the same for our lives.  Our early childhood goes by very quickly.  Then it takes forever before we wake up and realize we’re turning 40.  Then another long run to 60.  And the last goes by in a flash.  Oh no.  Dark thoughts.

Phase 3 Week 4 Day 1 recovering from yesterday

Dateline Wuxi, China Sunday March 24, 2013

Okay.  That was two breezers, two stiff Campari and sodas, and two very stiff hot chocolates with scotch.  Yes, that was enough.  Then there was the french bread with melted cheeze.  The bag of M&M’s, the two Dove white chocolate bars.  And working backwards, don’t forget the pizza, mashed potatoes with bacon, and chicken wings for lunch at Papa Johns, or the two peanut butter and banana sandwiches for breakfast.  That was a cheater day.

612 calories on the elliptical machine in my 31 minutes.  I feel much better now.

Phase 3 Week Three Day 7 Cheater Day undeserved

Dateline Wuxi, China Saturday March 23, 2013

576 on the elliptical machine this morning.  The machine is obviously wearing out.  It no longer feels smooth with each cycle, but bumpy and jerky.  We’re just hoping it lasts until we escape China at the end of June.

Last I was bad again.  First of all there was the noodles and beef dinner which simply can’t be on program.  Then there was scotch until I staggered into bed.  I will never have that six pack if I keep sabotaging myself, but I’ve said this before.  In fact, I’m sure by now it is a repetitive whine, a loop.  Time to stop talking about it and do something about it.

Phase 3 Week 3 Day 6 Friday Weigh In

Dateline Wuxi, China Friday March 22, 2013

Weird time on the elliptical machine.  I looked down at the numbers and my calorie count seemed abnormally, impossibly, high. Up over five hundred at the fifteen minute mark.  Then it started counting calories down and I ended up with 476 calories.  Crazy and not at all useful.

Here’s how my numbers have cone for the past three weeks:  97.6 96.2 97.5

And here are Ruth’s:  64.0 63.1 65.0

Well, what do I expect.  I’ve been cheating so much I might as well stop saying I’m on the program.  But when you fall off the horse, the only thing you can do is get right back on.

Phase 3 Week 3 Day 2

Dateline Wuxi, China Monday March 18, 2013

606 calories on the elliptical this morning in 31 minutes.

I do wish I could get myself to the point where I look forward to my time on the machine.  It’s not a bad time.  I get to think, plan my day, work out ideas, get inspired by possible postings.  And I do feel so very good when it’s over.  But somehow, getting on the machine is still something I have to make myself do, and do without joy or enthusiasm.  Working on it.

Both Saturday and Sunday were cheater days this week, and serious ones.  Saturday was my usual pig out on sugar and carbofats.  Sunday was a big wedding, and a serious lunchtime feast.  We did eat sensibly for dinner – poached salmon with rice and broccoli, and I did manage to resist or ignore the impulse to have a shot of scotch.  But still, unless I get serious about this, Phase 2 will not get me to my sixpack.  It will be just another period of watching my weight and beating myself up for going off the program.